The dissociation nation

A short reminder to stop the pretence and be of this earth.

It has been a good few years now since living in the UK that I became increasingly aware of the state of dissociation a lot of people are in. And it is only becoming more obvious, especially within the spiritual circles. Where you would hope to find people anchoring their wisdom and love into the world but more so despise reality with more fear sown by alternative news and escape in lands of the mind, dressed up as starry realms of soul origin or plant induced ecstasy. Don’t get me wrong , ecstasy is probably exactly what we need more of (hence why the normalised addiction to substances being so strong) and for sure there is more to this world than meets the eye, I myself believe the soul is far broader than a human lifetime. However our souls chose to live in this lifetime as a human now and I doubt by dissociation from our earthly responsibilities and very real pain we will achieve anything of matter to our soul.

We as a collective of the western society are in deep pain, unfortunately often without our conscious knowing. We have been raised in stressful circumstances. Most pregnant women nowadays are stressed and have little to no means to rest and care for their wellbeing let alone mental and emotional health which plants the first seeds of sorrow in the foetus she carries. We grow up in circumstances of disconnect from nature, community and ones own wisdom only further deepens the scars. Humans are great at adapting. Hence why it all seems so normal to us. Anxiety? Ah well, that’s just how it always has been. ADHD? Ah well, you could probably diagnose most of my friends, me included with some form of it. Addiction? Sure, we all know phones and apps have been designed to be addictive and hold us tightly in their grasp.

The problem with normalising this is that we accept it. Aa a fact. When it is actually not, it is simply that: and adaptation. We adapted to our environment and what it gave us. This means we can adapt to a new one as well. But we live in a free-will universe as my mentor Keith always emphasised. And we can make sovereign choices. But for choices we need options. We can’t allow ourselves to fall into the trap of the illusion of one single truth. We need to learn again to question: everything, including ourselves.

Glastonbury amongst other spiritual hot spots has always been prone to attract people who live outside the common narrative but also many who do so out of fear or hurt. They proclaim it a rebellious act of liberation, when actually they are still trapped within their own confines. Of course in the mainstream world we have as many who are disassociated, it’s the new norm. I notice it in friends who are not able to read my texts properly, repeat what I said as it was their own words but are not fully present in their meaning. I notice it in my clients who can’t seem to remember any instructions and repeatedly ask the same questions. I notice it in group sharings and small talk on the street in which not one real vulnerable word is spoken that reveals a tangible matter while many sentences pass about general processes or energy.

Once a space is created that allows for their systems to feel safe they can drop deeper but what once has been a quick endeavour, almost instantly after opening such space now seems to take much longer. The detachment and disconnect is stronger. Within the spiritual scene this is noticeable in new age small talk. Instead of “how are you?” - “fine, how are you?” they say “how’s your heart?” - “I’m processing lots of shifts” - “ah, yes the planets are retrograde”. It might sound more interesting but leaves as much a blank space as the simple how are you? - fine. exchange. no vulnerability, no explanation of what the “processing” really is about. And as soon as conflict arises high frequencies and love and light are being send around. No willingness to stay with discomfort, to express the pain, to let it move through the body. It all stays in the mind, is regulated far away either through another breathwork modality, ice bath session or mantra singing. Can you see how the same issue our society has simply dresses in different garments?

We either try to escape - through travels, gaming, meditation, substance abuse - or put such high expectations on ourselves that we can’t fulfil and therefore also block ourselves from being truly present. Both are two sides of the same coin. The spiritual bypassing and the exertion of control.

How can we find balance?

First of all by recognising when we detach, when we move away from sensing, feeling, inhabiting our body. Second by observing our copying mechanism.
Third by gathering enough curiosity to become courageous. Forth by practicing presence and patience, allowing ourselves time to unfurl slowly, safely, steadily. Meeting resistance with open arms. Accepting set backs. Fifth by blooming and leaving our imprint on this world, as imperfect as it might be.

Stop the pretence. Come back home. There are others who need you to ignite the flame and keep the fire going to guide their way back, too.

This is an unusual short one from me, a message that surely wants to be expanded and unfold over time but for now let’s leave it as a reminder to ourselves to walk each other home.

Coming next:

• Wild Woman post within the series Archetype of Avalon. Join us by upgrading your to paid member to receive access and mythopoetic guidance throughout the whole year.

• An invitation call out to join the Siren Songs, a collaborative project to share your wisdom, words and wonders for International Women’s Day on March 8th. Free for everyone to participate and co-create.